When Justin and I were getting married, we were shocked at all of the little ceremonial aspects that could be included in one's wedding ceremony. Let me share a few with you.
Ring Warming Ceremony
The ring warming ceremony is fairly new. Basically, you get a cute little holder for your wedding rings and you pass the holder around with the rings (and/or place the holder with the rings on a table near where your ceremony will take place) so that your guests can touch and "warm" your rings. Clearly, you need to trust the family and friends you have invited not to drop or lose the ring. Beyond that, when you actually put your ring on... Guess what? The ring won't actually be warm! Shocking, I know! I guess the point of this ceremony is to be inclusive of family and friends within your wedding, so that they can all feel like they had a special part in your wedding and marriage. :)
Sand Ceremony
This ceremony has been going on for quite a while. I love that it provides a little keepsake for you after the wedding day wherein you can keep the combined sand and say you created this masterpiece during your wedding ceremony. Other then that, I have no idea why you do this. It is basically the same as the unity candle ceremony wherein you symbolize that two families have "joined" together by pouring two different colors of sand into a jar or vase.
Unity Candle Ceremony
This ceremony is the only one I know of that the Catholic church allows during weddings. Usually, before the ceremony, the bride's mom and dad (and likewise the groom's mom and dad) together light a single candle. About a 1/3 of the way through the actual wedding ceremony, the bride takes the candle her parents lit and the groom takes the candle his parents lit, and together they light a candle that is usually placed between the two other candles. Like the sand ceremony, this symbolizes the union between the two families as formed by the newly married bride and groom.
I do have to say that if you aren't Catholic or getting married in a church or other building, you may not want to have this ceremony. Specifically if it is a windy day, candles have a bad habit of blowing out. :( If you are getting married in a Catholic ceremony, the unity candle may or may not be allowed in the church. With the church Justin and I married, this ceremony was allowed, as well as candles for our friends and family that were no longer with us, but no other candles or flowers were allowed. The church requested we not distract from the symbolism of the cross.
If you were at the wedding, you will note that Justin and I did not do the unity candle ceremony. The Catholic church will let you, but they definitely discourage it. They feel there is so much other symbolism within the ceremony that a unity candle ceremony is unnecessary. After talking about it, Justin and I decided that we agreed. (I'll talk a bit more about that in a minute.)
Tying of the Knot
I've seen this quite a bit, and I have to say I don't really understand it unless you like boats and/or grew up around ships. During the ceremony, the bride helps her groom tie a large knot signifying their union. (I thought the wedding ceremony itself was suppose to signify their union?)
Exchanging of the Rings
Obviously the rings have symbolism in and of themselves. They are circular and symbolize eternity or the circle of life. You give your significant other a ring since you can't actually take your heart out of your chest. (I guess.) Plus, there is the outward representation of the ring after marriage when you are out and about, and someone is considering hitting on you. Everybody knows if you have a ring on your ring finger, you are married.
It's recently become a "thing" to not exchange rings. (Think Prince Henry & Duchess Kate.) So is it necessary to exchange rings? No. Does exchanging rings give you an extra chance to show your spouse love? Yes. Who else will forgive one's significant other for losing a very expensive piece of jewelry when they take it off to wash dishes or work on the car? ;)
Communion
Communion is an awesome way to include God/the Holy Spirit/Jesus in your ceremony. However, it is important to keep in mind your guests and their feelings regarding this matter. In general their opinions are not important, but if you are Catholic and they are not, you may have issues with who can take communion and who will be okay not taking communion. For example, I am not Catholic and do not like the exclusiveness of Catholic communion, so I tend to make Justin angry in wanting to take communion without being Catholic. (I never have.) If offering communion but not allowing everyone in the room to take part, you may make people upset which is typically not something you desire on your wedding day.
So, there you have it. Those are the most common ceremonies and events I have seen within weddings.
Now, let me take a moment to tell you why Justin and I picked a straight Catholic ceremony without many of the "extra" aspects.
First of all, if you've ever been to a Catholic mass, you are aware that there is a set reason to the crazy, insane hour of service. Well, the wedding ceremony isn't much different.
1. There is a bit of prayer to bring you into "God's presence" and greeting your friends, family, and neighbors with a hug.
2. The first reading is from the old testament before the birth of Christ.
3. Second reading is from the life of Christ.
4. Lastly, there is a reading from the new testament, after the death of Christ.
5. The priest talks about how you should lead your life like Christ and tells you a story or gives you a goal for the week. (Love others like Christ loves you, etc..., etc...)
6. There is prayer and asking God to forgive your sins.
7. Usually there is communion (but not always during weddings).
8. Then the completion of service with hugs, wishing your friends and family a good day with hugs and kisses, and singing to lead you out the door.
Obviously weddings involve other elements, but Justin and I truly liked the set up of the Catholic service with every aspect having a meaning and involving every person in the church. Frequently we have attended services where the wedding only lasted approximately 10 minutes with a prayer, song, address to the church, and a kiss.
Getting married in the Catholic church with a Catholic ceremony did mean we had to consider the Catholic views on certain things, however. As mentioned above, no extra flowers or candles were allowed on the altar. Also, we were not allowed to marry outside. The music minister had a say in the music we were allowed to play. Then there was the whole issue of the priest we used for marriage counseling (which you have to do) and how he went out of the country for our wedding leaving us to find a deacon to perform our ceremony instead.
What are your thoughts on ceremonies and traditions? I've shared my opinion and now I would love to hear yours! :)
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